I remember a Maya Angelou quote that said something to the effect that grown at 18 is really a myth and a woman doesn't really know enough about life until she is at least 40. So if I had possessed 40+ year old wisdom at 18...I would have majored in English Literature, obtained an MFA in writing, and a PhD at Temple University in African American Studies. I would have blown less money on partying (well maybe not....I really enjoyed myself back then but do wish I would have purchased a house). I would have definitely not gone through with my first marriage...I was in the basement of the church crying with my sister and best friend because I knew it was for all the wrong reasons but didn't have the courage to call it off. And I paid dearly for that mistake and it took me over 10 years to work out the guilt behind it. I would have traveled outside the country and at least lived for a few years in West Africa... I no longer have the desire due to my health that has declined. I would not have purchased that damn Plymonth Horizon! Thats about it.
More than likely, I am not anticipating much new to post here on my blog until the end of the month when I return from a dye fest at the Mary Anderson Center for the Arts (see sidebar links). I've been feeling "somewhat" better and am trying to resume some household chores and cooking. P. has been working 12 hours and picking up the groceries and my 13yo and 15yo have stepped to the plate on doing laundry and some housework (early training is paying off.) Unfortunately, I don't have much energy and mental focus left to trust myself with sharp objects, new projects, or operating the sewing machine. I've been spiraling around in my head of all the new ideas I'd like to try but have decided to rest my little brain until I can get the fabric dyed in a few weeks.
I did spend some inspiring time today with my friend and art quilt guru, Juanita Yeager which always gets me going in a more focused and jazzed way. We talked about design ideas and working improvisationally with intent. She informed me of a planning meeting this Saturday for a new group forming around Art Quilting...so my focus will be from now until then reserving enough energy to make it to the meeting.
Hangeth in and peace!
We should learn from the things we regret and just think of them as learning experiences only. Regrets sound so negative. What we have now wouldn't exist without all that before stuff. I'm going with the idea that everything now is pretty good. :-)
ReplyDeleteHopefully, you will have lots of energy for your wonderful new art quilt group and your art workshop weekend, K. I can't wait to see what materializes. Take care.
Have a wonderful dyefest and be kind to yourself, ok? Regrets - nah. I remind myself that it's taken all the good and the bad to get to who I am now - the phrase "You can't get there from here" keeps circling round my poor tired brain! And HOW much stuff do we have to keep exploring in our art - LOL!
ReplyDeleteSo glad you posted this. You have spoken volumes about yourself in that little paragraph and I really appreciate it. I hope your health continues to improve. I miss your postings. Be strong and hangeth in there and blessings on your family for stepping up!!
ReplyDeleteYou "hangeth in there" yourself! I hope you feel better soon.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing in this post today. Sometimes I sit back and think like that too. All those would've, could've, should'ves just rush you sometimes. I have to remind myself that all of those choices have made me who I am now and I can't change them no matter how much I wish I did sometimes. However, I can change my future and that's pretty comforting, you know? Take care!
A Plymouth Horizon!!!????? Oh my....I had a tomato red Dodge Omni with a bad alternator. I loved that car....except when it would die on me....always at the worst possible times (like when I was on my way to take my state paramedics exam).....
ReplyDeleteGlad ya posted. I know a lot of us were thinking about you.
love ya,
teri
Great to hear from you again. I'm glad you're feeling better and I am THRILLED about your art group. They will be so lucky to have your artistic, creative energy.
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